As I carve out my own political work, I think about Bernie a lot. I imagine the idealistic, piercing and fierce young man he must have been. That ferocity is still there — you can hear it every time he speaks. But 50 years of kicking at walls in your path wears down the edges a bit.
50 years.
I wonder if he ever stood at the political crossroads and hesitated, knowing he was giving up the dream of dismantling an ailing system for the daily grind of making it a little bit better for the people in this moment.
And doing that, every day, for 50 years.
The dream in which he tore it down — and the dream in which we do — might not have come true.
But dreams that don’t moderate themselves with the messy particulars of reality make better kindling for the fires that keep us alive.
Working within a political system that is designed, from the foundation upward, to prevent significant change means relegating yourself to heartache, and to disappointment.
And that’s a choice, taking that on.
So when I think about Bernie, and all that he has worked for, I wonder when the moment came that he chose to work within the broken mechanism, knowing the successes would be small and the struggles vast.
I don’t mean that he hasn’t done enough.
But when he was my age or yours, when he was a 20-year-old filled with anger and righteousness, I wonder if he imagined revolution instead of slow erosion.
I wonder if he wanted to burn it down and settled, instead, for singeing the edges. And I wonder if he did it because some change is better than none.
There will be a moment at the close of my life, as my body fails and my mind makes its peace, that I will take stock of my life.
I think about that a lot, too.
In that moment, I wonder if I will look back at small successes and be satisfied, or if I will remember revolution.
It’s a risk, right? Stay within the system, helping ease suffering where you can, but knowing what you believe should be CANNOT BE as long as that system exists.
Or reject it, and maybe fail entirely. Or maybe succeed.
I know, it’s not that clear a choice. And you can do both.
But that’s where my head is, thinking of Bernie at midnight, day 394 of our pandemic.
#Solidarity in the dark times. And in the light.
#NotMeUs
Glad to know someone who thinks about these things at midnight on any day. Perhaps there is a way to do both - make positive change around the edges while building the foundation for the radical change in direction that is needed.